These quotes are by Fran Liebowitz. The first quote of hers that I remember admiring is - "I think I have to say that my favorite animal is steak." Now, that's funny. But it doesn't have anything to do with Mother's Day so I'm not including it.
"I never met anyone who didn't have a very smart child. What happens to these children, you wonder, when they reach adulthood?"
" If you are truly serious about preparing your child for the future, don't teach him to subtract teach him to deduct."
"Children are the most desirable opponents at Scrabble as they are both easy to beat and fun to cheat."
"Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections children tend to be sticky."
" Do not, on a rainy day, ask your child what he feels like doing, because I assure you what he feels like doing, you won't feel like watching."
"Your responsibility as a parent is not as great as you might imagine. You need not supply the world with the next conqueror of disease or motion-picture star. If your child simply grows up to be someone who does not use the word "collectible" as a noun, you can consider yourself an unqualified success."
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